Only Reptile Keepers Will Understand These!
If you’ve kept reptiles for any amount of time, then you already know.. our lifestyle is NOT for everyone. Reptile keeping is full of tiny, everyday moments that feel totally normal to us but seem absolutely unhinged to everyone else.
If you can relate to these, you're not alone! No matter how much your non-reptile keeping friends and family say you are!
1. Cricket Chirping... Where Crickets Are NOT Supposed to Be
The panicked scramble to grab a cricket that should've made it into the enclosure but didn't quite get there. Or maybe the sucker bounced back out at you in a last ditch effort to escape becoming a snack...
Then ended up behind the enclosure, between the dresser and the wall, or under the bed... NEVER somewhere accessible, and typically somewhere that you spend a lot of your time.
They will NOT stop singing you the song of their people.
2. "Wait... Was That A Roach I Just Saw?!"
Oh, just a Dubia roach!
You can try telling your friends, family, and landlord that no...
They're not the gross kind of roaches! They won't infest the house!
Their response being that all roaches are "the gross kind" 🙄
(Not all roaches are the same, and we get that!)
3. "Where Did I Set Those Tongs...?"
Placing yet another order for ANOTHER pair of tongs. Grabbing an extra set of forceps at the reptile show because you know your current set is due to vanish any day now...
There has to be some sort of feeding-tong-obsessed fairy that goes around and steals these things...
We can tell ourselves that, right?
4. "Your Energy Bill is Significantly Higher Than Other Homes of the Same Size In Your Area"
Get off our tails, energy company!
Some of us have a small army of lizards and snakes that like to stretch out over a warm rock or bask the day away on a nice branch!
And how would we keep the live plants alive in our bioactive enclosures without the numerous full spectrum LEDs shining on enclosures for 12-14 hours per day?!
5. Largely Unaffected by Getting Bitten
Non-reptile people (and sometimes new keepers – that's ok!) are very nervous to get bitten by a reptile.
Seasoned keepers know that the bite from most reptiles is completely harmless and is not typically painful either.
Reptiles don't have as many ways to communicate their feelings as a dog or a cat, and sometimes they are just feeling extra spicy, or extra hungry!
But we can all agree that we'd rather take a bite from a ball python than any dog or cat!
6. Keeping Skin... Shed Skin, That Is
Full, perfect, one-piece sheds: Truly a sight to behold!
How are we supposed to just throw them away without at least admiring them for awhile?
A perfect shed means your reptile is growing and their environment is dialed in enough that they were able to shed flawlessly. Your hard work and dedication to your animal has paid off and they are doing well – here's a perfect shed to prove it!
If we're being honest... it's basically a reptile keeping trophy. And it's totally normal to display trophies.
So go ahead – Keep the shed.
Display the skin proudly.
You've earned it.
7. Deep Poop Analysis..
While dog owners would be alarmed if their pup had a not-so-good poop on their carpet, EVERY poop from our reptiles happens inside of our home.
And sometimes.. right under the heat lamp
(They HAVE to know what they're doing...🤢)
Size, color, consistency; Feces are a window into the health of your reptile, and one of the first ways you can spot if something might be off with your pet.
Maybe you even have poop photos on your phone – We're not judging! And your vet probably appreciates you even more for it too!
8. Spending Hundreds on the Enclosure so They Can Hide All Day
You spent weeks building a bioactive masterpiece.
You have hundreds of dollars worth of specialized lighting, automated misting, live plants...
You traveled for hours to an expo to get showpiece cork branches.
And where is your reptile for nearly all of your waking hours?
Totally invisible.
Non-reptile keepers think you wasted your money.
Reptile keepers understand: secure, nocturnal animals snoozing the day away = healthy, comfortable animals.
And besides, we'll see them briefly as we are winding down for bed 😉
Reptile keeping is weird to the "uninitiated" but it’s a deeply rewarding, science-driven hobby rooted in understanding animals that most people still misunderstand. If non-keepers cringe at our habits – that's fine.
We’re advancing husbandry, doing well by our animals, and giving our reptiles lives that reflect how they actually thrive, not how humans assume they should.
